Why does EVERYONE love telephones except me?

I had my love affair with the telephone when I was in junior high in the latter half of the 1970s. You paid by the phone jack then, and our house had two: one in the kitchen on the wall with a corkscrew plastic cord that stretched to the floor, and one in the master bedroom sitting on a bedside table. We felt fortunate to have push buttons instead of dials, and life was good.

My best friend, Shawna, and I would talk, giggle, and sing for hours on the telephone, though our homes were only about a half mile apart down the street and across a school yard. I distinctly remember singing a Campbells soup commercial over the telephone: "How do you handle a hungry man? The man handler's!" We were the 'man handlers,' though neither of us had ever had a boyfriend. Oh, we laughed and laughed.

Phones were fun then and not complicated. If you were away from home and needed to call someone, you had to find a payphone and insert a dime for local calls, but that was no problem because there were payphones on every street corner and inside most businesses. Making a call from a payphone was a rare event. Almost everything could wait to be communicated until we were home.

I remember seeing my first cell phone -- a literal brick in size and weight attached to a self-important, technologically advanced co-worker's hip so that he could be reached anywhere in the event of an 'emergency.' (We were librarians, and I don't recall any serious library emergencies, but I guess we could have had one.) The first car phone I ever saw was in a BMW on 700 East in Salt Lake City. You could tell that the car had a phone because it had a little stinger above the back window. I was mildly impressed by the novelty of it.

But this phone thing has gotten out of control. Who really needs to be in constant communication, as though they or their potential callers are on life support of some kind?

I realized the phone thing had gone too far in the freezer section of my local grocery store where a man was talking in a loud voice (apparently to himself) about which vegetables to buy. The debate was getting kind of heated when I realized he was wearing a device of some kind above his ear and actually communicating with someone who was not in the store. What would have happened if he had brought home corn instead of peas, or both corn and peas? He was not authorized to make such decisions without placing a phone call.

I may be the only adult I know who does not want and does not have a data plan on a smart phone. The four other adults in my own household have the latest technology and wouldn't want to be without it, but for me the added convenience of having GPS and a digital phone book in my purse pocket holds absolutely no appeal. I have never used an app and do not want to. Something must be terribly wrong with me.

We pay handsomely each month for all of this instantaneous entertainment and information.  There's never a dull moment when you can watch a movie or television or shop or read a book in the palm of your hand.

Maybe I've stumbled onto something here. I like having dull moments to think my own thoughts. I like the fact that if I want diversion, I have to go out of my way for it.

My co-worker with the prototype enormous cell phone all those years ago called it his 'electronic leash,' and that is how I see all of them. What marketing genius convinced civilized people everywhere that they must invest in high tech tech status symbol phones, then pay monthly for the privilege of using them?

In the interest of full disclosure, and since payphones have all but disappeared, I do keep a very simple cell phone in my purse in case of emergencies (my own or others'). A cell phone is a necessary evil.

From Forbes: 13 Things Mentally Tough People Do Not Do

13 Things Mentally Tough People Do Not Do

1. They do not waste time feeling sorry for themselves.
2. They do not give away their power (by letting others make them feel offended, inferior, or bad about themselves.)
3. They do not waste energy on things they can’t control (like bad traffic, lost luggage, or other people.)
4. They do not take take primary responsibility for the happiness of others. (Everyone is responsible for their own happiness, and if you let others throw that off on you, you will be miserable.)
5. They do not fear taking calculated risks.
6. They do not dwell on the past.
7. They do not make the same mistakes over and over again.
8. They do not resent other people’s success, even people who do not deserve it.
9. They do not give up after failure.
10. They do not fear time alone.
11. They do not think that the world owes them anything.
12. They do not expect immediate results.
13. They do not fear change, but they do fear being complacent or stagnant.

– Cheryl Connor, Forbes, 11/18/2014  (quoted on the Rush Limbaugh radio show)

It's Never Too Late to Become a Mature Adult

Here I am, 49 years old and finally seeing myself as an adult, except when I'm not.

I do not consider myself a "Mature Adult"...
...when I stay up much later than I should
...when I eat all of the foods I shouldn't eat
...when I don't eat any of the foods I should eat

...when I sleep in
...when I avoid all forms of exercise
...when I don't wear a proper coat in bad weather
...when I procrastinate
...when I buy something with a credit card
...when I don't take the time to make my bed, or put my clothes away, or clean up immediately after dinner

 I do all of the above occasionally -- some regularly. 

I am also suspicious of my claims to adulthood when I laugh at Will Farrell commercials, when I delight in simplistic works of 'art,' and when I shy away from social situations and teacher confrontations.

I think for me the key questions are:
1. Can others depend upon me? and
2. Can I depend upon myself?

 
The answer to the first question is almost always YES. As a child I learned to be hyper responsible, because for a variety of reasons I had to be. When I became a wife and mother, that sense of responsibility quadrupled. 

The answer to the second question is not as clear-cut, because I do not take care of myself. I cannot depend upon myself as much as others can depend upon me. 

A few days ago I woke up with a thought which became the title of this blog post: "It's never too late to become a mature adult." I don't want to be a totally mature, stodgy adult -- I just want to be able to depend upon myself to make good choices for my present and future health and happiness. 

I think I am finally old enough (wise enough) to do that.

Alphabetical List of America the Beautiful (National Park) Quarters

I am providing this list as a public service because I couldn't find one like it on the internet. The U.S. Mint lists the quarters in their release sequence, but that makes it hard to track unless you keep up with them as they come out. I am just a very casual coin collector, so for me alphabetical is best. The release year is given at the end of each line.

There will be 56 ATB (America the Beautiful) quarters in all:

1.      Acadia National Park, Maine (2012)

2.      American Memorial Park, Northern Marianas (2019)

3.      Apostle Islands National Lakeshore Site, Wisconsin (2018)

4.      Arches National Park, Utah (2014)

5.      Block Island National Wildlife Refuge Site, Rhode Island (2018)

6.      Blue Ridge Parkway Site, North Carolina (2015)

7.      Bombay Hook National Wildlife Refuge Site, Delaware (2015)

8.      Chaco Culture National Historical Park, New Mexico (2012)

9.      Chickasaw National Recreation Area, Oklahoma (2011)

10.  Cumberland Gap National Historical Park, Kentucky (2016)

11.  Cumberland Island National Seashore Site, Georgia (2018)

12.  Denali National Park , Alaska (2012)

13.  District of Columbia, Frederick Douglass National Historic Site, DC (2017)

14.  El Yunque National Forest Site, Puerto Rico (2012)

15.  Everglades National Park, Florida (2014)

16.  Fort McHenry National Monument and Historic Shrine Site, Maryland (2013)

17.  Fort Moultrie (Fort Sumter National Monument) Site, South Carolina (2016)

18.  Frank Church River of No Return Wilderness Site, Idaho (2019)

19.  Gettysburg National Military Park, Pennsylvania (2011)

20.  Glacier National Park, Montana (2011)

21.  Grand Canyon National Park, Arizona (2010)

22.  Great Basin National Park, Nevada (2013)

23.  Great Sand Dunes National Park, Colorado (2014)

24.  Great Smoky Mountains National Park, Tennessee (2014)

25.  Harpers Ferry National Historical Park, West Virginia (2016)

26.  Hawaii Volcanoes National Park, Hawaii (2012)

27.  Homestead National Monument of America Site, Nebraska (2015)

28.  Hot Springs National Park, Arkansas (2010)

29.  Indiana, George Rogers Clark National Historical Park, Indiana (2017)

30.  Iowa, Effigy Mounds National Monument Site, Iowa (2017)

31.  Kisatchie National Forest Site, Louisiana (2015)

32.  Lowell National Historical Park, Massachusetts (2019)

33.  Marsh-Billings-Rockefeller National Historical Park, Vermont (2020)

34.  Missouri, Ozark National Scenic Riverways Site, Missouri (2017)

35.  Mount Hood National Forest, Oregon (2010)

36.  Mount Rushmore National Memorial Site, South Dakota (2013)

37.  National Park of American Samoa, American Samoa (2020)

38.  New Jersey, Ellis Island National Monument (Statue of Liberty) Site, New Jersey (2017)

39.  Olympic National Park, Washington (2011)

40.  Perry’s Victory and International Peace Memorial Site, Ohio  (2013)

41.  Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore Site, Michigan (2018)

42.  Salt River Bay National Historical Park, US Virgin Islands (2020)

43.  San Antonio Missions National Historical Park, Texas (2019)

44.  Saratoga National Historical Park, New York  (2015)

45.  Shawnee National Forest Site, Illinois (2016)

46.  Shenandoah National Park, Virginia (2014)

47.  Tallgrass Prairie National Preserve Site, Kansas (2020)

48.  Theodore Roosevelt National Park, North Dakota (2016)

49.  Tuskegee Airmen National Historic Site, Alabama (2021)

50.  Vicksburg National Military Park, Mississippi  (2011)

51.  Voyageurs National Park, Minnesota (2018)

52.  War in the Pacific National Historical Park, Guam (2019)

53.  Weir Farm National Historic Site, Connecticut (2020)

54.  White Mountain National Forest Site, New Hampshire (2103)

55.  Yellowstone National Park, Wyoming (2010)

56.  Yosemite National Park, California (2010)

Alphabetical List of State Quarters (and Territories)

I am providing this list as a public service since I can't find one like it anywhere on the internet. These are the quarters issued by the U.S. mint for states and territories. All are already in circulation.

I've been trying to collect 6 of each (one for each family member), so I need a list to carry with me of which states I need to keep and which ones I can use for loose change.

Alabama
Alaska
Arizona
Arkansas
California
Colorado
Connecticut
Delaware
Florida
Georgia
Hawaii
Idaho
Illinois
Indiana
Iowa
Kansas
Kentucky
Louisiana
Maine
Maryland
Massachusetts
Michigan
Minnesota
Mississippi
Missouri
Montana
Nebraska
Nevada
New Hampshire
New Jersey
New Mexico
New York
North Carolina
North Dakota
Ohio
Oklahoma
Oregon
Pennsylvania
Rhode Island
South Carolina
South Dakota
Tennessee
Texas
Utah
Vermont
Virginia
Washington
West Virginia
Wisconsin
Wyoming

OTHER TERRITORY QUARTERS ISSUED:

American Samoa

District of Columbia

Guam

Northern Marianas

Puerto Rico

US Virgin Islands

Driving Home at Dusk on a Summer Evening

Few houses have sitting porches, and fewer still have people sitting on them. It is more comfortable inside with air conditioning. Porch furniture in place, unoccupied. Streets deserted.

A man sitting on a boat trailor in the garage surveying his newly mowed lawn, a can of beer in his hand. I feel like I've interrupted something just driving by.

A small boy helping his dad spread mulch in their flower beds from a five-gallon bucket, scooped from the bed of a large pick-up truck. A big job for such a little guy. 

Pink and blue stripes across the sky. A burst of orange on the northwestern horizon. Friends and family in far flung places renowned for their beauty, but I am the lucky one.

This Morning's Epiphany

This morning I woke up with the thought (apropos of nothing):

PEOPLE WILL DISAPPOINT YOU.

I have no idea what I had been dreaming about or what my sub-conscious mind had been puzzling over, but it did not strike me as a negative, foreboding thought at all, like something in a fortune cookie -- just a realization of truth, a nugget of wisdom I had not articulated before.

People will disappoint me, often without meaning to. Sometimes, even despite good intentions, I will disappoint others.Worst of all, and most painfully, I will disappoint myself.

Even some of the closest, most nearly perfect people in our lives will sometimes fall short, often in small ways not even worth mentioning. It's called being human, and it's universal.

I have been a tough customer throughout my life, a person with very high expectations of myself and others. I have been perplexed by human weaknesses, including my own. My expectations will remain just as high - I do not regret those - but I hope to be able to remember this epiphany when I experience disappointments and want to shield myself from them. Disappointments caused by human shortcomings are a natural part of life.

The acknowledgement that people will disappoint me has had a strangely liberating effect already in the short space of seven hours:

• I am free to love everyone, despite hurts.
• I can also feel worthy of their love, even though I'm not perfect. 
• I can love myself despite having disappointed myself over and over again.

I reserve the right to protect myself from future hurt, but I know that a certain amount of hurt or difficulty is inevitable and necessary for our growth and understanding.  As the poet Kahlil Gibran said, "Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding."

I can forgive and love people anyway, and expect the same forgiveness and love in return. It is my right as a human being, and my obligation as a follower of Jesus Christ.

Our Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost are the only ones who will never disappoint us -- that's why we can safely place our full faith and trust in them.

People will disappoint us, often again and again, but it is our task/duty/challenge/commandment to find a way to forgive them, to love them despite their faults, shortcomings, hurts and limitations. We can also hope that they will love us despite ours.

If we truly believe in repentance and the power of the Atonement, in which our sinless Savior paid the price for the sins of all mankind (not just for our own sins), we  forgive and love one another anyway.

In junior high art class, I made a poster with fluffy white clouds on a blue, blue sky (indicative of my idealism) that said:

LOVE IS THE ANSWER.

WHAT WAS THE QUESTION?

That's how we can resolve difficult interpersonal relationships in our lives. We can love, which is our most natural inclination as children of a loving Heavenly Father.

*****

One more quote and a poem:

It is to the credit of human nature that…it loves more than it hates. – Nathaniel Hawthorne

THIS I KNOW

by C. Margaret Clarkson 

I do not know what next may come
Across my pilgrim way;
I do not know tomorrow's road,
Nor see beyond today.
But this I know --my SAVIOR knows
The path I cannot see;
And I can trust His wounded hand
To guide and care for me.

I do not know what may befall,
Of sunshine or of rain;
I do not know what may be mine,
Of pleasure and of pain;
But this I know -- my SAVIOR knows
And whatsoe'er it be
Still I can trust his love to give
What will be best for me.

I do not know what may await,
Or what the morrow brings;
But with the glad salute of faith,
I hail its opening wings;
For this I know -- that my LORD
Shall all my needs be met;
And I can trust the heart of Him,
Who has not failed me yet.