On Friendship

Some QUOTES on FRIENDSHIP with my thoughts:

I praise the Frenchman – his remark was shrewd, / How sweet, how passing sweet is solitude! / But grant me still a friend in my retreat to whom I may whisper, Solitude is sweet! – William Cowper (1731-1800)

[I enjoy solitude more than most people, but I also love spending time with friends.]

But oh the blessing it is to have a friend to whom one can speak fearless on any subject; with whom one’s deepest as well as one’s most foolish thoughts come out simply and safely. Oh, the comfort – the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person – having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but pouring them all right out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, certain that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then, with the breath of kindness, blow the rest away. – Dinah Maria Mulock Craik(1866)
[This sort of friend is very, very rare and special.]

A true friend unbossoms freely, advises justly, assists readily, adventures boldly, takes all patiently, defends courageously, and continues a friend unchangeably. – William Penn
[Funny how you never think of historical figures like William Penn having friends.]


A friend is, as it were, a second self. – Cicero
[An amazing observation for someone born in 106 BC, proving that wisdom is timeless.]


A friend is a person with whom I may be sincere. Before him, I may think aloud. – Ralph Waldo Emerson
[Emerson is on the short list of famous people I hope to meet in the hereafter.]


True happiness consists not in the multitude of friends, but in the worth and choice. – Ben Jonson
[True, true, true, though I think happiness is much broader than friendship.]

I am, and till then, and ever after will be your admirer and friend and lover. - John Adams, writing to wife Abigail

[The joy of being married to your best friend!] 

Is there a dearer name than friend? If there is, teach it to me. – Abigail Adams, writing to husband John several years after their marriage

[Oh, I love this! I adore John and Abigail Adams' relationship.] 

The glory of friendship is not the outstretched hand, nor the kindly smile, nor the joy of companionship; it is the spiritual inspiration that comes to us when we discover that someone else believes in us

and is willing to trust us with their friendship. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

[To be spiritually inspired by a friend is a wonderful thing!]

A Morning Epiphany: Self Control

Violinist at Pike's Market in Seattle (July 2014) 

My first thought of the day is often my best, most inspired thought. Today as I sat up in bed it occurred to me that one of the things I admire most in others (and in myself, when I achieve it) is SELF CONTROL. People are wonderful and great and beautifully unique for many reasons, but when you think about it, self control is a quality that compels admiration. Self control is often the precursor to and the antecedent of success in almost any endeavor.

People succeed when they force themselves to do what others do not. If they go to work each day and work hard, they will most likely have a successful career. If they structure their life around eating properly and exercising, they will be fit. If they finish a course of study, they will receive degrees. If they clean their house, their house is clean (at least for a minute).

Self control, then, is a kind of magic that isn't shrouded in mystery. It doesn't rely on fate or destiny. If you want something, you do something, even if it's something you don't necessarily want to do. Sometimes you have to do it for years and years and years. Sometimes you can summon enough self-control to finish an undesirable task in one day (clean out the garage) or one hour (sort the laundry) or one minute (make a difficult phone call) and reap the rewards immediately.

If we aspire to succeed at anything, self control will most likely be a part of the process. If we instead give into personal weaknesses, we may be thrown off the path.

Some related thoughts from my Quote Collection: 

The most fundamental and illustrious of our occupations is to live each day. To compose our character is our duty…to bring order and tranquility into our lives. There is nothing so beautiful and legitimate as to play the man well and properly. As we learn to control our persons, we ready ourselves for greater responsibilities. – Michael Eyquem de Montaigne (1533-1592)

I was finally forced (by MS) to learn the lesson that many people had already learned: We are not in control of everything in life. Life is like a stained glass window. Parts of it are gloriously colorful and bright, while other parts are dark, and the dark and dreary places are the ones that bind us together. – Tamara Hall, motivational speaker, 1999


Good habits, which bring our lower passions and appetites under automatic control, leave our natures free to explore the larger experiences of life. Too many of us divide and dissipate our energies in debating actions which should be taken for granted. – Ralph W. Sockman 

The intelligent want self-control; children want candy.- Mevlana Rumi

There is no chance, no fate, no destiny that can circumvent, hinder, or control the firm resolve of a determined soul. – Unknown

Liberty is the prevention of control by others. This requires self-control and, therefore, religious and spiritual influences; education, knowledge, well-being. -- Simon Wolf

We have more control over happiness than we think and don't have to be like a buoy to life's whims — we can choose to be an anchor that doesn't get knocked around every time things get tough. -- Stephanie Meade

The most difficult thing is the decision to act – the rest is merely tenacity. Fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life. The process is its own reward. Adventure is worthwhile in itself. -Amelia Earhart

Dear Abby's definition of maturity: “This is maturity: To be able to stick with a job until it’s finished; to do one’s duty without being supervised; to be able to carry money without spending it; and to be able to bear an injustice without wanting to get even.”