Waiting

I seem to spend A LOT of time waiting. I think I wait more than most people, but that isn't always a bad thing.

I've been waiting outside of schools since my oldest child started Kindergarten over 20 years ago. He emerged from the think tank of his classroom on the first day to report that they had learned about bears. "What did you learn about bears?" I asked curiously, since I had taught him almost everything he knew to that point in his young life. I knew that his learning trajectory would not always involve me from that point forward. "They eat fish, and berries," Taylor said. "Lots of berries." Hmm, I could have taught him that.

I am still waiting for my children and learning what they are learning.When I pick my son up from light rail after his classes at the U, we discuss Shakespeare, Medieval lit, and economics. That's a good trade-off.

Our youngest child, though licensed, does not have a vehicle of her own, so I spend part of each day waiting for her. [She has taken the bus to and from school exactly once. That is partly because she has always attended schools outside of our boundaries until last year.] If I am not carting her to and from school, I am carting her stuff -- forgotten rehearsal clothes, for example, or a quick snack on 13 hour days to tide her over until dinner. Because she is very appreciative, I like being available in her hours of need, and I like being the first one to hear her assessment of each day. "How was escuela?" I ask daily, and she begins. That's the payoff of waiting.

I've accumulated a lot of hours waiting for my husband to come home from work. I've waited for him to finish rehearsals and performances. On one occasion, I even waited for him to join the children and me on a vacation already in progress.

I've waited for loved ones to come out of surgery. I've waited for pregnancy tests and biopsy results. I've waited for babies to be born. I've waited for bad news, and I've waited for good news.

I've waited on waiters. I've waited for the curtain to go up. I've waited for Christmas. I've waited for countless bells to ring.

I've spent whole days and nights in airports waiting. I've waited on subway platforms, in train stations, in ferry lines, and in cruise terminals. And it goes without saying that I've waited in a lot of lines at grocery stores and the DMV.

So I have to conclude that waiting is part of living, and that living is waiting, in a way. Good things come to those who wait, especially those who wait upon the Lord. (Isaiah 40:31) It appears that, despite the best efforts of would-be efficiency experts like myself, the universe is not intended to run smoothly and on schedule all the time.

I've experienced the frustrations of waiting so many times over my lifetime that it has brought me to this realization: the best thing we can do to endure inevitable and unpredictable periods of waiting is cultivate patience, because patience is a virtue and a divine attribute, and [here's the main point] because we ourselves are happier when we are patient. Everyone around us is happier, too.

While waiting, it's helpful to keep the mind meaningfully engaged. Waiting gives us opportunities to think, to pray, to write, to learn, to doodle, to read, to dream, to plan, even to create.

Some quotes on waiting:

All human wisdom can be summed up in two words: wait and hope. – Alexander Dumas

Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is not. – Henry Van Dyke (1852-1933) 

Beyond myself, somewhere I wait for my arrival. – Octavio Paz, "The Balcony"

They also serve who only stand and wait. -- John Milton, "When I Consider How My Light Is Spent"