Wednesday, January 6, 2010

My Pet Peeve

Sometimes I think about my blog and wonder what I should write about. I don't like to go more than a few days without updating it, so I was pondering this today at Wal-Mart, of all places, when it occured to me that I should write about my pet peeve -- the thing that bugs me more than anything else in the universe -- namely, gigantic toilet paper dispensers in public restrooms that are bolted to the wall three inches above the baseboard.





I remember when these endless spools of paper-thin toilet tissue replaced perfectly good but otherwise ordinary dispensers in public restrooms everywhere. In addition to holding a year's supply of toilet tissue, these dispensers were supposed to be better because they were 'handicap accessible.' I would like to meet the contortionist disabled person whose arm bends between the wrist and the elbow to turn the wheel and tear off squares of tissue one at a time because the paper's perforation is infinitely weaker than the weight of the wheel itself. Am I making any sense here? Can anyone else relate?!!!

And heaven forbid I should have to switch plates on the bottom of the dispenser to access paper on the supplementary roll. It's virtually impossible to break the code and not get your fingers caught in the triangular plastic teeth of the thing.

The entire system seems designed to a) conserve toilet paper (Cheryl Crow would definitely approve) b) prevent toilet paper theft (Who's going to carry a 20# roll of paper our in her purse?) c) reduce the odds of having to ask the stranger in the next stall for toilet paper, and d) extend the time between restroom cleanings.

Here's an idea - rather than having the top of the dispenser situated as an arm rest so that paper is dispensed just above the ankle, why not mount it higher on the wall? If I could see where the paper comes out, I might be able to dispense it.

Maybe I need to buy a larger purse so that I can carry a personal roll of Charmin everywhere I go.

Or maybe I should just count my blessings that this is the biggest issue I have to complain about at the moment. Life is good. As I read in an obituary this morning: If I were to die today, life wouldn't owe me a nickle.